Snapshots of Dementia: It Takes a Team
Tom and I with our “original 5.” Photo Credit: Jake Burton After my Christmas revelation via our former pastor, I did something I’ll never regret. First, I wrote my mother and told her the Reader’s Digest version of our story. Although we spoke every few days, I had not yet shared my concerns for Tom’s health. I knew it was time—past time. And in my typical style, I found it easier to write than speak (especially since I knew this story would come with tears). After I wrote the letter, I realized something else: It summed up a huge area of our lives that I had kept hidden from almost everyone. I was already on the hunt for a new neurologist, but we needed much more than that. We needed prayer. I’ve shared plenty of the mistakes I made on our journey, but at this point, God moved me to do something I’ve never regretted. I had an email list of friends who had supported our family in prayer on various mission trips through the years. I quickly pulled names and addresses together for a new “Pieper Prayer Team,” added a note at the top and forwarded my letter to Mom to my praying friends. I expected prayer. But I didn’t expect the peace and power I experienced as responses came flooding in and prayers went flying up. I had fought to protect Tom for so long. Now, I told myself, the support mattered much more than any remaining fear of what people would think. I also received wise counsel from various friends who had either a medical background or caregiving experience. Almost without my realizing it, the Lord had surrounded me, physically and virtually, with a wonderful team. But Tom and I already had a smaller, more intimate team that had loved and supported us for years. Our five adult children (and two children-in-love) listened, loved and helped—each in his or her own way. Even as they grieved the reality of what was happening to their dad, they also urged me to keep seeking answers. I also consulted with them all about a big change I planned to make. I’d decided to sell our home and move to South Carolina, close to our oldest daughter and her family and also to our second daughter, who lives just two hours away. I knew we could support each other no matter what might come our way. Once again, what seemed like several insurmountable tasks lay before me. We still needed a diagnosis for Tom. My salary and freelance work could cover our expenses—barely. Our home would need some repairs and upgrading before we could put it on the market. And...
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