Snapshots of Dementia: The Great Alaskan Adventure, Part 2

Snapshots of Dementia: The Great Alaskan Adventure, Part 2
Saturday, August 19, 2023 by Marti

(L-R) Sheryl, Marti, Tom, and David in our first meeting on the ship

Our Great Alaskan Adventure taught us—in more ways than one—how thankful we are that “I’ve Got a Friend Like You.”

We knew we’d be traveling with Barbara and Hardy (see Part 1 of “The Great Alaskan Adventure” if you missed it.) But we didn’t know that we’d also be traveling with friends we have known for more than thirty years. David and Sheryl Neal were members of the second church Tom pastored, located in Southern California. Their three children are close to the same ages as our oldest three children, and when our fourth child and third daughter decided to come more than five weeks early, the Neals got the early-morning phone call and child-sitting duties.

David and Sheryl have remained our friends through the many years and moves. Whenever we went back to the area, we made sure to visit them, even staying in their home for a few days on our last trip there. Sheryl and I have stayed in touch via emails, phone calls, and texts about joys, sorrows, and prayer needs along the way.

The day before we left for Seattle, where we would embark on our cruise, one of our foster grandchildren (who happens to live with that fourth child of ours) required emergency surgery. Of course, I texted Sheryl to pray. In the process, I mentioned that I was out running final errands for our cruise, which apparently I’d forgotten to tell her about.

“Wait, we leave for an Alaskan cruise Friday,” she texted back.

I didn’t even consider the possibility that it might be the same cruise. I knew other couples who had gone to Alaska this summer, and I also knew multiple cruise lines cover that route. Still, Sheryl asked me to share the details (see text exchange below).

I didn’t actually faint, but I’m sure I came close to it. And I’m thankful we have the photos to prove that we ended up on the same ship. For them, this was a Celiac Cruise; Sheryl has navigated her way through celiac disease for some time, and the wonderful invention of unique cruise, complete with a private dining room and chef, has made travel possible for her once again.

Will Tom remember us? the Neals wondered ahead of time. When Sheryl mentioned this to me, I assured her he would. He might not remember the names of the couples he sees in Sunday school every week, but he would remember these dear and longtime friends. I had no doubt.

We all boarded the ship Saturday but couldn’t connect until Sunday. I had told Tom before we left that David and Sheryl would be on the ship, but that day, he didn’t realize we would round a corner and see them coming toward us. His eyes widened in shock.

“I HAVE MISSED YOU SOOOO MUCH!” he told David as he wrapped him in a giant hug.

We sat down and talked, and talked, and talked—at least David, Sheryl, and I did. Tom mostly sat and listened, happy to enjoy our time together in his own way. We had excursions at opposite times the next day, so, since shared meals weren’t an option, we decided another meeting would have to wait till after that.

But God again had plans all His own. As we left with Hardy and Barbara for our whale-watching excursion, guess who—out of the 5,000 people on the ship—we met returning to the ship from their own excursion? You can see by our smiles in the photo below how amazed we were yet again.

L-R Our first "chance" encounter, in Juneau, Alaska

Soon after that, David was diagnosed with COVID, which ended our planned meetings. And although he was confined to their cabin for the remainder of the cruise (he recovered quickly, and none of the rest of us caught it), God gave us two more unplanned, socially distanced meet-ups with Sheryl, one on the ship and one as we were all returning from our final excursion. At that point, all we could do was laugh, talk, and agree that, by now, the “chance” rendezvous didn’t surprise us at all.

Even though Tom is LWD, all four of us know the truth of these lyrics from “A Friend Like You”: “Through all of the laughter and tears/ Through all of the questions and fears/ Through all of the winning and losing and trying/ I will be by your side/ ‘Cause you and I are friends for life.” Throughout this time of caring for Tom (and even before, on the long and winding road toward diagnosis), I have been grateful to have several dear friends for life who have loved, prayed for, and supported us in countless ways. And how good of God to bless us with two of them during one special week this summer!

I’ll share more about traveling with someone LWD in Part 3, which I hope to post next week. But you can see why I wanted to share the “Great Adventures” of Parts 1 and 2!

Have you been to Alaska? Have you made a trip of any length with a friend or loved one who is LWD? And have you had chance encounters with friends that you knew were more than just chance? Feel free to share your story in the comments below or on social media. Our story matters, and so does yours.

Share This Blog: